I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
