Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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