so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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