it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i think i scared a bird with my dick
We had to coat check the pizza.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Your penis caused this!
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
