Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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