I wish I only lived at night.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
