While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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