I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
she peed on how many people?
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
