Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize