Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
