I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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