so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
