What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
