I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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