Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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