Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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