turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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