Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize