I skipped work to stalk him.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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