So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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