haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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