The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
