id be glad to
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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