Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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