Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I supernannyed him into submission
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