i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
