question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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