It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
