I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
