this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You may now shotgun with the bride
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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