Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
