i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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