i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
