I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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