I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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