Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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