ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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