You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
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