I'd wear matching sweaters with you
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
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