So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
