i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Why did my mother make you get naked?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
