And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
