So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
