Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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