Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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