Is it normal to miss your booty call?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
