just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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