She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
