so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
pray to the hookup gods
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
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