"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
